"Is it not too soon?" "In my culture, the bereaved do not attend celebrations for a year." "This would be considered disrespectful in my family." These some of the comments I heard during the time leading up to the memorial golf tournament. I had not even considered that concern when we began planning a few weeks after the accident. These remarks were reminders that the "rules" for grieving and mourning are very diverse. In some cultures the immediate family members wear black for an extended period of time. In others, mourning attire is white. Not black and white. Black or white. Or red, yellow, purple. As with most rituals and traditions, there is no universal "right" or "wrong". As for me, I will continue to make my choices based on what resonates within. Judging from the feedback, that event resulted in so many experiencing some solace, moments of happiness, and a slight lessening of the pain. How on earth would it have been more "proper" to wait a year or more?