Monday, July 25, 2011

The Dreams Begin

So, the dreams finally begin.  I had not dreamed of either of them since they died.  Then, a couple of nights ago, the first one.  About Michael, about me.  In it, the subject of his death came up and I was very angry at a stranger's passing comment indicating how little value she placed on my son's life.  I became upset to the point of yelling.  I left the scene shaken, formulating the blog I would write about this incident entitled, "I Lost It!".  When I awoke, I was reminded of so much.  That as a mother, I will still fiercely protect my son, even after he has passed.  That my anger can still flare up in a moment's notice.  And that clearly, blogging has become an integral part of my life.

The following night, it was Kelly's turn.  She was with one of her best friends and her twin brother.  Through the dream story, she expressed matter-of-factly that in the years following her mother's death, she was unable to depend on others "to do" for her in the way her mother did.  Despite the efforts of many caring people in her life, ultimately no one could fill those shoes.  When I awoke from this dream, I was left with such deep sadness.  However, upon reflection, I recognized a powerful testament to her mother's love.

Both dreams revolving around motherly love and death.  I was curious to see when the dreams would begin.  Grateful that they have.


Gena said...

How lucky you are to have them visit you in your dreams.

Breathing Life said...

once a mother, we are mothers for ever and ever.