Newest and Most Precious Piece of Art

    The newest, and now most precious, piece of art to adorn my walls was recently gifted to me by my 13-year-old granddaughter when she arrived here for a summer visit with her family. It had been safeguarded in a cardboard tube for her flight from Spain. When she pulled it out and unrolled it before me, I was awestruck. She had drawn this beach scene using pastel and explained that from left to right, in birth order, the figures represented my three children: her mother, Auntie Kate, and Uncle Mike. And yes, those are wings on the back of his shirt. I knew that she had a talent for creating art and loved attending after-school classes but nothing could have prepared me for this incredible image. She captured so much in this scene - family, connection, nature, and love.

     A week later, she and I visited a local art shop to choose the mat and frame. When I picked up the completed piece a few days ago, I explained the significance of the picture to the staff member helping me, including the reason for the wings. Less than a minute later, while returning to my car parked right outside the shop, I noticed one beautiful, white feather lying directly in my path! It is now affixed to the glass, acting as another reminder of how strong this symbol of connection continues to be.

Motherly Moments

     

     My young, newly-married mother gave birth to me, her first born, a few months after arriving here from Germany in 1956. With her minimal English and limited options, she cleaned houses for the first ten years to help make ends meet. Happily, she was able to give that up when she realized her dream of becoming a hairdresser. She absolutely loved her job and the clients in Edgemont Village. 

     When she passed away fourteen years ago, her family and friends dedicated a memorial bench to her in this same neighbourhood. If you find yourself in the village on Mother’s Day, you may notice the fresh flowers on her bench. If you have a few minutes, why not sit and enjoy the moment? If you are a young, harried mother, it may be an opportunity to catch your breath. If you are a mother with adult children, you might reminisce about precious moments you enjoyed while raising them. If your own mother is no longer with you, maybe a cherished memory of her will fill your heart. If you are a mother who has lost a child, perhaps you will settle into the deep connection with that love that never dies. And if you are lucky enough to be a grandmother, well, you might sit for a long while, just smiling at your good fortune. 

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Miracle Log

     Serendipity, coincidence, happy chance event... words used to describe the small miracles that make our lives a little sweeter. Lucky for me, I experience them almost daily. Having a dream about a person I had not thought about for years, only to have someone else mention that same person the next morning. Looking for a small box of goofy sunglasses everywhere I thought it might be, then finding it later that day, within in a larger box marked 'small picture frames' which I had opened for an unrelated project of creating a photo wall. Receiving tickets, out of the blue, to a sold out event I had wanted to attend.

     One way to to help foster this awareness in children is to keep a Miracle Log available. I came across this idea while reading Spirit Games, a book by Barbara Sher. Whenever something serendipitous occurs, anyone in the family can log in by writing down what happened. It can also include the wish that preceded the event, if there was one. There seems to be a snowball affect - the more often these little miracles are noticed, the more often they appear. Keeping track of them can help bring children comfort and joy, and heaven knows, we all thrive when showered with frequent doses of both.

www.diaryofanintuitive.com

Timely Death Cafe

When I first heard about Death Cafes on a radio program this past summer, I was intrigued.  Year-round events where strangers meet to discuss this weighty subject over tea and cake.  Over the past few years, these get-togethers have been gaining momentum worldwide.  I am looking forward to my introductory experience with a Death Cafe tomorrow, which is also day one of a two day festival known as Day of the Dead. In cultures where this holiday is recognized, November 1st is dedicated to joyfully celebrating with the souls of children who have passed.  The following day is when deceased adults are welcomed back to join the living in celebrations of life.  Last week, I realized that my book launch happens to fall on the second day of that festival.  Before my son's death, I had given the holiday little thought, but two years ago, during that first November without him, I imagined how supportive it would be to be immersed in a culture that celebrates this.  Then last year, by chance, I was in Sedona for their Day of the Dead festivities.  This year, through serendipity, I again have both days covered - the first will be spent expanding my mind, the second, celebrating a creation born out of death.   

Timeless Truths

As the rain continues to fall, I am curled up indoors with the spiritual writings of Kahlil Gibran's The Prophet, a timeless collection of poetic essays infused with love and mysticism.  I find comfort in these timeless words of wisdom, particularly in those poems I included when honouring significant life events.  On Children, a passage that was read aloud during each child's dedication ceremony.  On Death, a poem I delivered at my mother's funeral.  On Marriage, a passage I shared during both daughters' wedding celebrations.  In a rich and gentle manner, Gibran expresses profound truths that my heart and soul recognize, just as countless other hearts and souls have for generations. Heavenly. 

Still 25

Tomorrow will be the second time I observe, rather than celebrate, the day of my youngest child's birth.  For the past week or so, I have occasionally found myself thinking about how old Michael would have been this year.  I would consider the number 27, and toss it around in my mind, trying to make some sense of it.  Then, while swimming lengths a couple of days ago, I became curious about this line of thinking.  How old he would be is no longer relevant, since he is no longer here.  So why does my imagination want to play with this notion?  Is it perhaps a desire to hold onto what was?  My children's ages were always two years apart, and it remained that way for twenty-five years: a very simple pattern: 2, 4, 6 or 11, 13, 15.   The last time the numbers fit was two years ago.  It is a confusing process trying to adjust to the idea that such a fact can change, and that counting by twos is no longer accurate.  My children are now 31, almost 29, and still 25.  Both the pattern and I have had to adapt.  Happy Birthday son. 

Gift of Wellness

Ensconced in a traditional Swiss house in the charming village of Klosters, high up in the alps.  An ongoing symphony of cow bells playing in the background.  Awakening to children from an adjoining apartment singing their scales.  Good friends generously offering us this opportunity to enjoy a few weeks of wellness.  Expansive meadows, cool mountain streams, colourful wild flowers, and stunning views right outside the door.  The slow pace here holding space to just be.  Grateful to be able to enjoy such a glorious gift.              

The Illusion of Secrets

Attending a Celebration of Life for a fond old family friend a few days ago.  Passing after eight decades here on earth.  A man who had been part of my life since early childhood.  His family, my family and a third one spending so much time with each other.  Three newlywed couples immigrating to Canada as young adults.  Embarking on new lives here. Soon raising children together.  Resulting in three families closely intertwined.  Picnics, camping trips, sleepovers, house parties, and holidays together.  Then abruptly, eleven years later, contact ceasing between our family and the third one.  No longer allowed to play with their daughter.  Severing the relationship between our brothers as well. Confusing times.  No one explaining why.  Then decades later, experiencing a powerful vision while napping on the couch.  Shedding light on what had transpired.  Mentioning it to my mother.  She confirming the details.  Giving her an opportunity to share the hurt still felt by that betrayal.  Adultery.  A painful family secret revealed.  Now running into my former playmate at the service.  Seeing each other again for the first time in forty-four years.  Discussing the situation of broken ties.  She only now learning of the reason why.  The ripple affect of the choices made by those two individuals long ago still reverberating in the universe.  For any number of reasons, neither accepting full responsibility for those actions in this lifetime.  Perhaps caught up in the mighty illusion of secrets.  Obliging them to carry the weight of those decisions into subsequent incarnations.

Spiritual Smorgasbord

Reflecting on various spiritual concepts and activities my children were exposed to.  A smorgasbord of experiences.  As infants, each one being celebrated with a personal Dedication ceremony facilitated by the Unitarian church.  A few years later, all singing in the local United church choir.  During that same period, participating in a sacred event at a nearby Buddhist temple.  Receiving Dao, involving the awakening of ones third eye.  Then as a young teen, each daughter experiencing a unique celebration marking her transition from girl to woman. Throughout the years, all three spending cherished time with their Oma, a practising Catholic.  Diverse experiences amassed from numerous sources.  All stimulating their spiritual awareness.

Lasting Friendships

A walk along the seawall this morning with a friend of forty years.   Time to catch up on each other's lives.  A daily occurrence in junior high.  Less frequent during college and university life.  As young wives and working mothers, a couple of times a year.  More often now.  Our life philosophies may be different, daily routines unalike, and our neighbourhoods further apart.  It is the similarities however, that have kept us connected.  Married over thirty years.  Mothering three children.  Navigating family dynamics.  We both know what is involved.  The two of us valuing this relationship and making the effort to stay in touch a few times a year, every year.  Lasting friendships.  Priceless.

Father's Day

As I reflect upon this upcoming Father's Day, many thoughts come flooding in.  Gratitude for the challenging relationship between my father and I which has enabled me to learn so much.  Loving him but choosing not to spend time with him.  Our karma.  As for my husband, he and his father of 87 years keep in touch regularly, and will celebrate their relationship with a shared meal tonight.  The space that was filled with Michael will loom large as one father sits with his only son, who in turn is enduring the loss of his only son.  Sunday, golf and a BBQ where my husband will be showered with love from his living children.  Different fathers, different experiences.  All receiving love.

Birthday Letters

Do you have young children in your life?  Sons, daughters, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or godchildren?  For each one of my children I had a special notebook in which I wrote annual Birthday Letters to them from age one to eighteen.  I would note their interests, experiences, family life, and highlights of the year.  When they became adults, they had the opportunity to revisit their younger years, tap into some memories, and see their childhood through my eyes.  Such a priceless gift from one heart to another.

Canuck Place Children's Hospice

Yesterday afternoon, Kelly's oldest brother and I toured Canuck Place Children's Hospice which allowed us to get a real sense of the value your generous donations in Kelly's and Michael's names means for so many  families.  This innovative facility was established in Vancouver fifteen years ago, the first of it's kind in North America, and it is now a model for the rest of the world.  How fortunate we are to have such an amazing group of dedicated staff, volunteers, private and corporate donors, all working together so that children living with life threatening illnesses receive the support they deserve in such a positive environment.  All families have their challenges, but by caring for others the way we do, our burdens are lessened which enables us to carry on.