Precious Birthday Connections

     Early January marks three significant birthdays of people very dear to me (two now in pure spirit form and one here on Earth) - my mother's on the 4th, my son's on the 8th and a close friend's is on the 9th. Last year's incredible display of spirit energy related to these birthdays will be hard to beat. 
     On the morning of January 5th, 2019, I tied a bouquet of flowers to my mother's memorial bench in Edgemont Village as a belated acknowledgement of her birthday. I then strolled over to one of my favourite home decor shops, a fixture in this community for 30 years, run by a mother/daughter team. While driving by the shop the previous day, I had decided I would buy my close friend a gift card from here which I would pop in the mail for her birthday. As the daughter (who happened to attend high school with Michael) rang in my purchase, her mother asked me for the name of the recipient so that she could personalize the card with calligraphy. While she was putting the finishing touches on the present with cello wrap and ribbons, I began telling her that the gift was for my friend of over 40 years. Midway through, something caused her to freeze. A moment later, she proceeded to tell me what had happened to her shortly before leaving home that morning. She had been standing near her husband's computer area, looking up at the huge bookshelf filled to the brim with books. All of a sudden one of the books fell off the shelf and landed right in her hands. She immediately recognized it as my book, Diary of an Intuitive, wrapped in its protective cello sleeve. She mentioned that she hadn't looked at it for a few years and couldn't figure out why it had fallen. Then, as she continued telling me the story, she put two and two together and told me it had been my son. Being intuitive and sensitive to spirit energy, she realized why that particular book and why that morning.
      Then it was my turn to share details with her that would flesh out the entire experience. I explained that I had just come from my mother's memorial bench whose birthday was the day before, that Michael's birthday would be in three days time, and that my good friend, who was extremely close to Michael and celebrating her birthday the day after his, would for the very first time be missing our family birthday celebration at The Old Spaghetti Factory in Michael's honour. She had also edited my book. For the shopkeeper to share her experience with me made my day, filling my heart to near bursting, and gave me something precious to reflect upon for years to come.
www.diaryofanintuitive.com
Photo credit: Bruno Glaetsch

What's Up With Jack?

What's up with Jack? Jack was in the title, as well as the main character, of the book my granddaughter was excited to share with me three days ago, the first she's borrowed from her school library. A well written story about a highly creative boy.

Jack is the name of the musician I received an email from yesterday, who heads up a band I love, sharing a link with his fans to a song he wrote after the miscarriage of the child he and his wife had been expecting. Listening to his song, with both head and heart, reminded me of the miscarriage one of my daughters had a few years ago, a soul who had communicated his name to me, Jack, prior to his return to the invisible.

And today, both grooms in the two wedding ceremonies I performed were named Jack. Only one other groom had that name in the other fifty weddings I've officiated this year.

The name Jack means God is gracious. And apparently in the Middle Ages, Jack was a general term for man or boy. I am curious to find out what my repeated experience with this name is meant to show me. With meditation and a desire to understand, I'm hopeful it will soon be revealed.
www.diaryofanintuitive.com

Reaching for the Stars

Exactly one year ago today, my paper child was launched into the world.  At that time, I made a commitment to myself that I would do what I could to get this book out to as great an audience as possible. With the ongoing support from family, friends and community, slowly but surely, it is happening. During the first year of its life, Diary of an Intuitive acquired a distributor, was placed into retail locations, listed on Amazon, mentioned in articles, entered in prominent competitions, sent to acclaimed authors, sold at markets, purchased by public libraries, and donated to various organizations. Like the figure on The Star tarot card, I will continue to reach for the stars.  After all, I also have some great support from up there.

Crystal Clear

Last night, I had the pleasure of attending an uplifting crystal bowl group mediation.  It took place, after hours, inside a shop carrying gifts, accessories, clothing and more, items designed to add joy and serenity to people's lives.  I had stopped in once when it first opened late last spring, but had not been there since.  After we dozen or so participants settled ourselves in a circle, the facilitator opened the session with a prayer from George Harrison, then explained that the vibrations we would hear while he played the bowl would address the throat chakra, associated with communication and the colour blue.  With eyes closed, we relaxed into ourselves as he continually moved his mallet around the rim.  He played the huge, crystal bowl for thirty to forty minutes, then let the sound fade away.  After opening my eyes and allowing myself to fully return to my body, I looked across the room, and that is when I saw it.  My book displayed upright with full cover view, on a shelf behind the facilitator. I was unaware that this particular shop carried Diary of an Intuitive.  More to the point, I had not noticed the book while passing back and forth in front of it numerous times while arranging chairs for the group, nor had I noticed it during the circle introduction.  While I was processing the magic of this moment, the facilitator invited us to share any experiences we had had with regards to the meditation and he answered individual's questions.  He told a joke involving Sitting Bull, reminding us of the importance of humour, spoke about love being the ongoing connection between life and death, and referred to signs by which people often identify the presence of a loved one who has passed.  After a few minutes of reflection, I began telling the group about what had just occurred to me.  Most of them were unable to see the book from where they were sitting, so I described it to them: a heart containing the words love and gratitude positioned on the blue cover of a book communicating experiences about life and death, and some of the in between.  Almost as an afterthought, I began explaining the story behind the two feathers positioned beside the heart.  No sooner had I  spoken the words "two feathers", when the facilitator's wife, who had been writing notes, lifted her head, and with a nod towards her husband, told me, "That's his name".  Seeing the confusion on my face, her husband, who had introduced himself to us using his French name, explained that he had some native ancestry consisting of two warring tribes, thus the name Two Feathers. Oh my. So many overlapping themes: blue, communication, love, death, feathers. Never a dull moment on this spiritual journey. It's not a stretch to imagine that Michael's spirit guide Geronimo was infused into this magical evening, as well. 

Staggering Synchronicity

What are the chances?  After our MGMG cheque presentation at Canuck Place Children's Hospice, their representative gifted my husband and me a copy of their recently created notebook.  As soon as I saw it, I could scarcely believe my eyes - the design and size of it is so similar to that of my book, anyone would think they are related!  Solid blue cover with die-cut heart of same size and placement, four word title, coil bound spine, wrapped in cello packaging.  Seconds after receiving it, I hastily excused myself, ran out to my car and grabbed a copy to show the woman.  None of us could believe the staggering synchronicity. Never having seen anything even close to this design before, I wondered if there could have been a link between my designer and theirs.  After looking into it, turns out, there is not.  Another magical thread connecting all involved even deeper.  Love it!

Spontaneous Support

While running errands in the Village yesterday, I stopped in at the local wine merchant.  The staff were offering wine tastings, which is always a treat.  After enjoying samples and purchasing a bottle, I was making my way to the door when a woman suddenly left the tasting area to come over and speak with me.  She told me how much she had enjoyed reading my book and the insights shared therein.  She mentioned that her daughter and my son had been high school friends, then went on to ask how I was doing.  After chatting for a few more minutes, I thanked this stranger for taking the time to have this conversation, and how deeply I appreciated hearing that she valued the book.  It was a brief, yet meaningful, encounter.  Spontaneous moments of support such as this mean so much.  Receiving evidence that Diary of an Intuitive is making an impact, is divine.

Uncanny Connection

New Year's Day ... what a wonderful start to the year.  My husband and I made the leisurely hour's drive to Squamish to view the multitude of eagles wintering there.  To be in the presence of these majestic beings is always awe-inspiring.  During our riverside walk, we witnessed dozens of eagles soaring, preening, squawking, and feasting.  Upon our return to the car, I took a chance and made an impromptu call to an old friend. It had been over a decade since we had last spoken, having lost touch after his divorce and subsequent move to another province. I had heard that he was remarried and now living here.  Well, he generously invited us over and ten minutes later, we were in his home.  Our relationship quickly picked up where it had left off all those years ago.  His wife was very welcoming and easy to talk to.  After a short time, I realized that she and I have many shared interests, including some of the same obscure book titles on our shelves. During the course of the afternoon, our friend revealed that his wife had also lost a son due to accidental death.  He too, twenty-five years old.  Uncanny that this woman and I also share the experience of dealing with this particular life-changing event.  So glad I made the call.  So glad they were home.  So glad to have renewed one friendship and opened the door to the beginning of another.

The Sum of Its Parts

It has been eleven days since I last posted here, by far the longest spell between entries since I began this blog thirty-three months ago. During this past week, each time I sat down to write, I kept thinking that I could address one or two of the numerous instances of positive feedback the book was receiving.  I would get stuck - there were, and continue to be, so many examples to choose from.  Friends, family, acquaintances, the community at large, as well as complete strangers are responding to the book as I hoped they would - with open hearts.  When I sat down this afternoon to again ponder a possible blog entry, I reflected on the overarching themes of love, support, and gratitude.  It then became clear.  Rather than trying to focus on just a couple of specific examples, it was easier to address the sum of its parts.  Each of the individual acts are expanding our collective energies of love and gratitude.  Love and gratitude, the two words found inside the open heart on the book's front cover.

The Paper Child is Born

After an eighteen month gestational period, the paper child has been born at last.  Energetically, producing this book had similarities to pregnancy - nurturing this being, eagerly anticipating its arrival, and periodically, feeling impatient that it was not coming soon enough. Then, when the time was right, ushering this creation into the universe and celebrating its existence.

Birthing this creative project was truly a team affair.  The strong and frequent messages from spirit guided the perfect individuals to step up to the task long before any of us (the writer, editor, designer, and printer) recognized that a book needed to be created.  Together, we have succeeded.  Through this book, a broader audience will be exposed to many comforting messages including "Death is not the end" and "Love is eternal".  I feel deep gratitude from the invisible and hear their sighs of relief.

Give and Take

Yesterday, I was fortunate to have numerous meaningful experiences with individuals willing to genuinely engage, resulting in powerful flows of give and take.  First off, a morning meeting with a fellow book club member to discuss minor changes to my book.  That was followed by coffee and a heart-to-heart with a young friend going through a very difficult time.  Later, an appointment with a business acquaintance to enquire about his product.  That led to further conversation wherein we discovered several shared connections and similarities, including both of us losing a son.  Stopping in for an impromptu playtime with my granddaughter before returning home for a three hour phone session with my best friend to go over final edits.  Thankfully, none of these experiences were rushed or shoehorned in, allowing adequate time for total immersion in each and every moment.  Rather than merely showing up, each one of us brought our best self to the experience, resulting in deeper connection.  Truly magnificent.

Letting the Light Shine In

Experiencing another week on the roller-coaster of intense highs and lows.  Continuing to work with the graphic designer, readying my book for print -  necessitating combing through each page repeatedly, resulting in understandably heightened emotions.  Marking another Mother's Day - visiting with my daughters and extended family, four generations of mothers and their children gathered together. Organizing the upcoming memorial golf tournament, resulting in daily opportunities to reconnect with community and friends.  At times, I feel weighed down by the more difficult aspects of these endeavours.  Then, as I began writing this post, out in the sunshine this afternoon, I recognized that woven under, over and around all the challenges are the nourishing elements of support, love, and gratitude.  All those involved are mutually giving and receiving these life-sustaining energies.  Support. Love.  Gratitude.  All opening the door to let the light shine in.

Friend to Friend

Other than going out for an invigorating run through the canyon this morning, I spent most of the day working on my book, a rewarding, yet emotionally challenging project.  Again today, I thought about how grateful I am that my best friend is dedicating hours upon hours of her free time to edit this book.  Even though there is still much to do before it gets published, thanks to her, I can see light at the end of the tunnel.  Then late this afternoon, I received a surprise message from a young woman I have never met.  This friend of Kelly's, now living in the Okanagan, had communicated with me only once before, via Facebook last year.  She was now contacting me to share her delight in recently finding out that one of her new co-workers happened to be a good friend of Mike's.  These two discovered their astonishing connection after the young man explained where he lived - across the street from our family's cabin.  My heart soared as I read about this crazy, wonderful association, and I can well imagine the comfort and stories they will share.  Support can come from those we have known for years, as well as from those we hardly know, and all of it is greatly appreciated.   

Undoing Moments

Back home.  Upon awakening, planning to commit this entire day to working on my book.  Optimistically anticipating finishing the edits of the final entries, then sending them off for proofing.  Moments after rereading my original post of the one year anniversary, the phone rings.  It is a collection agency asking for Michael Gibson.  I explain that my son died over a year and a half ago.  The woman expresses her condolences and requests the obituary or death certificate for confirmation.  I agree, hang up, and take care of it immediately.  Tears falling.  Will these undoing moments ever end?  Minutes later, it occurs to me that this is an agency I have never heard of, and has likely been given an old file from one of the initial organizations I dealt with last year.  I want to minimize these out-of-the-blue, heart wrenching incidents.  I call the agency back, and get a different representative.  I tell her that a few weeks after Michael died,  I received invoices addressed to him, regarding money he owed.  At the time, I called the companies involved, then sent copies of his death certificate.  I ask this agent where this particular file has come from.  I want to understand why they do not have the information that he is dead.  In a very aggressive tone, she informs me that she is not able to discuss those details.  She goes on to say that it is all protected by third-party federal regulations, blah, blah, blah.  These last three words, not hers, but rather, what I hear.  I try rephrasing my question.  In an unkind manner, she interrupts to inform me she cannot help.  Then, hangs up on me.  Hopefully, she never has to deal with the death of her child.  Perhaps she will find an alternate path to gaining some compassion. 

Exquisite Encounter

Sitting cross-legged on the outdoor sofa, composing a passage for my book.  Inching closer towards publication; the twin energies of passion and heartbreak my constant companions.  While running in the canyon earlier in the day, reiterating to Michael my desire that he stay close.  To bolster my spirit, and continue assisting me with this work.  Now, fleshing out a piece regarding the shared floral arrangement on display at both his and Kelly's services.  Taking me back to those two very difficult days.  Ten minutes into this process, noticing a hummingbird approaching the nearby feeder.  Then, watching in amazement as it continued flying straight past the feeder, making its way under the glass roof, towards the French doors.  Following a direct path, there and back, in a stop-and-start fashion.  Parallel to the couch, within arm's reach, the entire time.  Before leaving the enclosed space, turning towards me, and hovering close to my face.  Pausing there for quite some time, indulging me in a tête-à-tête.  Then, returning to the trees.  Leaving me filled with awe and gratitude.  Over the course of the afternoon, repeatedly returning to check on me.  Each time, stopping in close proximity for several moments, before flying away.  Another unique experience reassuring me of the universe's support.  This exquisite one-to-one encounter a magical response to my original request.

Beautiful Butterflies

Before leaving for this trip, dropping off the rough draft of my book at a friend's.  A talented graphic designer and artist offering to help with layout and illustration.  Arranging to leave it with her to brainstorm various possibilities.  Sitting beside each other at her kitchen table.  Explaining the material I had gathered thus far.  Discussing potential themes and images.  Turning to the photo of a shelf in my living room.  One dedicated entirely to Michael and Kelly.  The display including photos, candles, feathers and other tokens.  Explaining the significance of each item aloud.  Then intentionally choosing to skip over one.  Thinking it was less important than the rest.  Seconds later, watching a yellow butterfly enter the room.  Coming in from outside through a small opening on the left side of the main window.  Located quite a distance from where we were working.  Flying closer, then circling around the back of my friend's head, continuing behind mine.  Then returning to the outdoors via the narrow opening on the far right side of that same picture window.  Again through a space no wider than my hand.  Executing a perfect C shaped flight.  Shaking my head in disbelief while witnessing this once in a lifetime experience.  Exclaiming my utter surprise to my friend.  Pointing out the one item on the shelf in the photo I had not bothered to mention.  A yellow fabric butterfly mounted upon a smooth stone.  A decoration that had originally been placed in the pot of an orchid plant.  Receiving this sympathy gift three weeks after the accident.  From the owner of a small shop I occasionally frequent.  Holding onto the ornament.  That plant long gone.  This trinket obviously just as valuable as all the others up there on that shelf.  That beautiful butterfly coming to show me just that. 

I ♡ U

Immersing myself in the creative process of producing the book.  Based on that first year.  With such great support.  Currently collecting images to consider including therein.  Flipping through photos taken from Michael's camera.  All printed off a few weeks after he died.  Coming across one I had completely forgotten about.  Having first seen it long before the ongoing penny theme became evident.  This picture capturing a loving message.  Spelled out with these copper coloured coins upon a tabletop.  I ♡ U.  Feeling the love behind it.  Adding a layer of understanding.  Shedding light on this theme.  Now recognizing that it began long before the end.  

Looking Forward

Standing on the threshold of a new adventure.  Ready to embrace the next chapter of my life.  Devoting attention and energy to publishing a book.  Based on the entries of this online diary.  The seed for this idea planting itself late last summer.  Growing stronger over the ensuing weeks and months.  After today, posting here less frequently.  In order to do justice to this project.  Looking forward to stepping into this journey of the unknown.  Wholly identifying with the first card in the Tarot.  The Fool positioned on the brink of a precipice.  With pure potential, beginning another cycle on The Fool's Journey.