Erratic Times

It appears that many people are in the midst of experiencing erratic times.  During the past few weeks, unpredictable and disruptive energies seem to be present in larger than normal doses, and I see them reflected in several ways.  Many routine transactions going sideways. Numerous freak accidents occurring to people engaged in ordinary activities.  Lives lost in most peculiar ways.  Another shakedown taking place.  It will be interesting to see where this leads, to find out what we are being prepared for.  I am curious, not fearful, for these are not preventable outcomes - they are all happening for a reason.  Living each and every day to the best of our ability is, and always has been, our first order of business.  And perhaps, all this is simply happening to serve as a reminder of that.

Cloud of Grief

Yesterday morning.  Blindsided by a heavy cloud of grief.  Blew in without warning.  Undeterred by the bright skies and sunshine outside. Stubbornly anchoring itself.  For no particular reason.  The date having no special significance.  Not missing them more than on other days.  It just happened.  This process of grieving so unpredictable.  Resulting in a 'holding my head above water' kind of day.  Profound sadness penetrating my entire being.  Weighing it down.  Tears flowing. Breathing laboured.  Despite meditation.  Not eased by the self talk of how much worse it could be.  Its firm grip remaining even after a long walk along the ocean.  Not relieved by a conversation with a friend or phone call to a relative.  Accepting this is what it looks like at times. Hopeful that today will be better.  Confident of being able to weather it if not.